S A B A S M E A

PART IV

Monday, 8/28/10

Good night’s sleep, even Steve… we didn’t get out of bed until 7:00 am, an almost unheard of, decadent time to awaken… Our room is beginning to grow on Steve as the shower is awesome… I think it has something to do with the decorative tiles but he claims it’s more of a water flow thing… whatev. Pig ‘n’ Pancake is a local restaurant that serves breakfast and lunch only and it is a tradition that we go there for breakfast when in Cannon Beach… we tuck Sarah in her carrier in the car and walk in… I order the veggie skillet and Steve opts for the Western Omelet… in Oregon there is no meat in a Western Omelet… they’re so enlightened up north! Off to Ecola State Park where you’ll be able to visit our ashes once we die, in case you’re into that kind of thing… it’s a most beautiful park with sweeping vistas (yes, I just said “sweeping vistas”) of the ocean… it’s gorgeous, absolutely… I’m admittedly not very well traveled but it’s hecka pretty, really… the fee to get in is $5.00 and it’s an honor system thing as there is no attendant on duty… they take credit cards now… ‘seems kind of out-of-place, this modern convenience in a place that looks almost prehistoric… huge trees (even bigger than that lamp in our room), ferns as big as the lamp shade of that lamp in our room, and as we are all about tradition, I always look out the window during the drive into the heart of the park and say, “Sasquatch!” ‘Cuz if there’s anywhere in the lower 48 states your likely to spy the elusive critter, it surely would be here… the woods are sooooooo dense… it’s really a lovely drive, made all the more beautiful by the trees, dappled sunlight, (how often does one get to use “sweeping vistas” AND “dappled sunlight” in a day? Not very damn often, but I digress), and no music! Blessed, blessed silence, broken only by my occasional Sasquatch (!) sightings… Steve takes his obligatory one million pictures as the one million he has at home apparently are not enough but I keep this to myself as even though I have enough shoes to last three lifetimes, I know at some point in the future, I’ll want more.

Later that day: We went back to town to lie on the beach. Steve decides a beach umbrella is just the ticket for he (who I’ve long suspected is part vampire) and Sarah… the Oregon coast is having spectacular weather: Sunny and Warm (note the capital letters)… so a beach umbrella does sound like a good idea – you’d think so but cruel fate had something else in store for my white, white husband… We took a walk to Mariners Market, the local grocery/sundries/caramel (or is it carmel?) store where he purchased a really cute one with these 3 matching bags you’re supposed to fill with sand to keep it from blowing away… first we settle ourselves on the private deck of the hotel, reserved exclusively for guests only or anyone clever enough to reach around and open the gate… it’s very nice with REAL Adirondack chairs and tables (but sadly, no ashtrays)… of course the umbrella is not cooperating as there is no sand on the deck with which to fill those three bags… no problem! Let’s go on the beach (where I can smoke) and put those cool bags to use! Blanket laid, we settle down for a nice, relaxing afternoon… Fast forward to 3 seconds later and “Whooosh!” Our fancy new umbrella is tumbling down the sand towards Haystack Rock, a mere mile or so down the beach… Steve goes running after it, retrieves it, all the while using those colorful expressions you might hear when watching a rerun of The Sopranos and plants it all the more firmly in the sand… Fast forward five seconds and “Whooosh!” it takes another tumble… Steve catches it before it gets too far, and starts to close it up, peppering the sea air with language that would make any sailor proud… “Here, let me try,” I suggest, knowing full well of my superiority at these things which require patience and woman’s touch… Lovingly, with great care and precision, I refill the bags, meticulously placing them just so, precisely anchoring the umbrella itself, confident it would hold… You know where this is going, right? Fast forward to seven seconds later when the whole damn thing turned inside out and ripped in three places…. More swear words from Steve, (I think I actually saw a few seamen blush) as he scoops up Sarah and announces he’s going back to the room… I stayed on the beach, sans shade, smoked cigarettes and took a nap… the umbrella is now in a landfill in Oregon I’m sure, but we still have the 3 bags… I know there’s no earthly reason to keep them, but somehow just the sight of them makes me giggle.